You all know what ‘clickbait’ means, here is my attempt at writing a blog with that concept in mind. Hence the title – what one question have I continued to ask myself for the last ten years or so of my retirement?
‘Clickbait’ has been on my mind as an irritation since I started looking for footwear to combat my neurology ( a bonus effect of my diabetes, I think, nothing is certain in my health world but it seems like all the trouble I have with balance and general unsteadiness could be explained by neuropathy, could be, I emphasise). Anyway I started looking at on-line adverts for miracle-bringing footwear, not that I would buy footwear on line but those adverts, and there are many, really do seem to be the answer. Foolish me.
Back to the one question that has remained with me all these years – should I be pushing myself to do ‘things’ or should we, as my daughter keeps telling me, kick back relax, you’re retired? Or words / concepts to that effect.
I admit I’m not a very relaxed person so I’m inclined to the first option – push yourself, you’ll be dead soon. And, yes I know, if I push too hard being dead will come sooner rather than later. It’s a conundrum alright which is probably why I’m still asking the same question ten years later.
So this question, which has never gone away, came to the forefront of my restlessness this past weekend. Without any planning I drove the Land Rover up to the barn, of late I’ve not done much in the way of driving (Mrs Summerhouse drives us in our small Kia) this last 18 months or so and the Land Rover, Defender is a beast to drive. Changing gear (stiff) with depressing the clutch (heavy) etc. is hard work.
Anyway I drove it for the whole weekend. When we were there (at the vineyard) I cut some of the grass. Again, even with the light mower, that was physically demanding but necessary. If you remember the recent blog about the kids working on the vineyard to get it back into some kind of shape, we didn’t want to let it go again. Hence the mowing.
Then, after this start to the day, we drove (me again) over to our local market town of Masham (pronounced Massam) to walk the dogs. We ended up walking for an hour (twice as long as our current walks). And then because we deserved it, sat outside the pub and had a lager and G and T. Walked around the market and bought cheese, apple tart and books, then drove to the next pub and had a snack and a glass or two of wine, beautiful day. Phew. Drove back to the barn, mowed a little more, followed by a, rare this year, meal outside looking at the view. Finished off the day reading the weekend papers. Impressed?
The above is noteworthy, apart from it being demanding and busy, because it’s the kind of thing we used to do before I got ill and everything became restricted. So apart from the fact that I was knackered all this was a sign that perhaps our retirement lives were getting back to what we used to call normality. Normality in this case defined as having an appropriate degree of challenge.
And, as if that wasn’t enough, I have taken steps to return to my folk fiddle group on Thursday night. True I haven’t actually managed this yet and it would be easier to regard this as a bridge too far in the ‘pushing myself’ concept, but it would be a biggy if I manage it as this is probably the area of my recuperation that has proved the most elusive.
True, this week also has a phone call from the diabetic nurse today, a visit to the podiatrist clinic on Thursday and a meeting with the urologist on Saturday, yes, they’re working Saturday. So it’s not just me pushing myself. But even if it were, the question that I posed at the beginning of this retirement blog remains, given I’m clearly not out of the woods health-wise, as can be seen from the previous paragraph, am I pushing too hard?