The last two blogs on this retirement site have featured ‘unsettledness’, strange word I guess but then I rather like it. It’s an accurate descriptor of how I’m currently feeling without resorting to what I would call a label. I never liked labels when I was working as a psychologist even though or perhaps because they were incredibly popular. Seems like they’re even more so these days. To me they’ve always seemed like a reason (excuse) for inaction rather than a stepping stone to sorting out a problem. A label is only genuinely useful if it leads to a solution that a person would not have without it. That’s my view and these days, 11 years into retirement who cares what I think?
But using words that help a person understand more about their situation is largely helpful I believe. Hence my using the word unsettled. Anyway I intend that this blog shall be the last of this current theme I just couldn’t resist applying it to my experiences of supporting my football team. You can see from the limited number of blogs in this category, i.e. Forest, how rarely I seek to understand my retirement by referencing this area. I have ignored the impact on my life by referring to an often-stated piece of advice – namely anybody that puts his or her well-being in the hands of a sports team (or individual) is asking for disappointment and misery. I’ve written this before so no need to labour the point now. Except…
I’ve also said, in reference to a number of life areas – it’s the hope that kills you. And so it has been with me these last few weeks, which happen to be the beginning of a new football / soccer season. I do try not to get too optimistic because, well you know the rest – that way heartache lies. But we, i.e. Forest did make an amazing start, not only winning 3 – 0 but doing it in some style. In addition we have signed what appear to be a number of talented players.
This latter achievement thanks to our newish owner. There is a saying ‘Beware Greeks bearing gifts’, I looked it up and it originates from the Trojan war and the gift of the wooden horse from the Greeks to the Trojans (you know the rest). Why do I mention this now? Well, because our owner happens to be Greek and he has gifted large amounts of money to the club to buy new players and it may be a problem. He seems to want to determine (with his team) how it is spent.
To be brief, just as I was starting to believe that we might be about to have a successful season, it was reported that this same owner had fallen out with our manager (successful in previous seasons). So all my optimism was a bit shaken. I felt foolish for allowing myself to believe my well-being could be positively affected by sport. Hence the theme of this blog Unsettled part 3. Time will tell how this falling out will pan out.
So far in the three games this season, Forest have won (as above) drawn and lost every bit as badly as they won in the first game. So yes, I am unsettled. But then more fool you for putting your trust in a football team. Something I rarely do but I thought that this time might just be different. There might be an area of my retirement that brought me consistent and predictable pleasure. Silly old me.